Some times

There are things that you know and you make your mind think you don´t care at all but they´re there stalking at your happy moments every single second of your day but then when someone turns on a flaslight and you are forced to see them, they´ve become moster with sharp fangs and claws and then come out to get you and they step on you being really careful of not leaving you without a single complete bone... And you are forced to pretend everything´s ok and that you don´t care because you believe that maybe you can fake it 'till you make it and righ there is the monster controlling you, making you pretend and poking at your sides so that you lie, so that you hide and you have no other way out because you can´t let a explosion happen, you´re fragil glass but an explossion will make shatters of glass go out in every direction hurting everybody around you... and not all of them are guilty and you don´t care to swallow the monster because you care too much of the ones  who are just there, just like you forced to be...

Double Life: Truth in Lies

A/N: this one ugh!! the pix for this one has been the hardest one to find... 

and...

*gasps* Nichole´s been hiding things from me!! how could she?! 

one more thing, with this part, DL has 80 posts!! and over 200 pages wow me! haha

******

“Everybody that came in contact with you or your mother before you were born and before she passed away”

“Who are they?”

“We´re still researching”

“I don´t believe you”

“You´ve killed many…”

“But you”

“I was a nobody there, I can assure you I hadn´t much knowledge. I just had to take care of the baby… assist… but I told you that already…”

“Alright, what else you can tell me” the wind had started to blow harder “Talk!”

“You asked how your parents had paid for an expensive procedure as in vitro –the girl nodded- they… didn´t, well, they just had to donate…”

“I´m a grown up, talk”

“They have do donate …-the woman was trying to find the words- their cells for studies, for scientific research”

“I was part of the research” the girl realized and her eyes felt watery but she willed the tears back. Natasha nodded “Did they know?” the girl whispered

“No, they didn´t know, I doubt they would have agreed to it if they had known”

“So they just put me in my mother to see what happened?” the girl felt a rage starting to boil within her

“They were just trying to enhance certain characteristics…”

“But you didn´t know ‘cause you were just an assistant?”

“I only learned that as we started to research the people involved…”

“Why did they want a monster?”

“They didn´t”

“So I just… Ok –the girl, brushed her hair back- What did they want?”

“They wanted someone faster and stronger and more agile…”

“What happened?” the girl asked already guessing the answer

“When your mother passed away… they canceled the research, they burned and deleted all documents or most of them…”

“I´m an experiment gone wrong” the girl said it with a perfectly calmed voice, her eyes cold like glaziers

“Nichole…”

“No! Tell me who canceled the research? Tell me who made me this way! Tell me who played at being God with me!” her voice was still calm but there was an edge to it

“You´ve already taken care of the ones we know of”

“I doubt young men and house wives had anything to do with that”

“Some of them were the ones they loved, your father wanted to make them suffer before sending you to them”

“All the ones I´ve killed have been related… to… me like this?” she asked fearing the answer. A mute no was what she got. “Who?”

“We needed money to fund our own research”

“And to live well” she laughed humorlessly walking back closer to the thick stone wall “What else you had to tell me?”

“Nothing else… only that I got your ID”

“You´re lying again”

“I´m not!” the woman stood up and walked towards the girl

“Where´s the place in which they made me? The place where you worked?”

“I told you last time I was taken there and I never knew where it was… I haven´t found out yet”

“Fine… but next time you better tell me –she turned to look at the woman- and I also want all information on my father´s business associates”

“Why?” the woman took a step closer giving her an ID card

“It´s my business, I want to know”

The woman looked to a side and focused suddenly on something

“The boy” she said, Nichole followed her line of vision. Her drawing pad had fallen when she´d jumped off the wall, it was open in one of the portraits of Joshua that she´d done during the afternoon “He was here with you”

“I have portraits of you in that drawing pad too” the girl picked it up but a page fell, it was a pair of eyes colored green

“If you really care about the boy, you should get away from him”

“I don´t care in the least about him” the girl picked the page

“You should remember what happened to the last boy you kissed” the woman said in a motherly tone reminding Nichole of the third accident she had have.

“This boy is my art project and I could care less what happens to him… but if you ever mention that incident again I will hurt you” she said through clenched teeth

“I was just looking out for you since he didn´t listen to my warning I want you to be careful… you were pretty hurt that time… I don´t want you to go through that again…”

“Worrying about me doesn’t suit you, especially since it´s all faked, so limit yourself at bringing the information that I ask from you”

“Just be careful”

“Shut up and leave” the girl hopped on the wall again along with her drawing pad, she waited until Natasha was out her sight and hearing range and then she waited a little more feeling the imminent rain approaching the school grounds.  

Nichole would´ve stayed there but she didn´t want her drawings to get wet even if they had made Natasha aware of Josh’s presence. The girl jumped on the side of the school, grabbed her bag and ran to her room, the cold air messing her hair.

Double Life: The Truth in Lies I

A/N: this was like 6 pages long which is why I decided to make it in two parts and also I´m doing it b/c this half seems to b good like this and the other goes will like that but then it´s all one whole scene, just a long one. 

Ah! also, this one -the whole thing comes w/a song!! As I wrote the tittle I remember of this song and then when I went to listen to it, it fit Nat/Nic´s relationship -kinda

so, it´ll b here too

****

“You came to meet me!” a cheerful voice said on the other side of the stone wall. The girl didn´t bother to even look down.

“Give me a hand” the woman reached up. Nichole glanced her way “Come on! Help me, I’ve been walking for a while in that muddy forest” the woman wrinkled her nose

“Next time enter through the main gates in a car if you want to avoid the bother of walking”

“You sound especially angry today –Natasha climbed the wall and sat with her legs dangling- I thought you´d be glad to see me”

“And why would you make me glad? Quite the opposite, you are annoying as hell”

“What a humor! Maybe I should just go!” the woman pouted

“Be my guest” the girl didn´t look at her but kept her eyes at her drawing pad

“Aw you hurt me… and I think you´d like to know that I´ve successfully managed to dig more information related to your birth” the woman grinned

“You´re such a liar. You could have just told me what you´re about to tell me now instead of making me see your face one more time”

“Why are you so mean to me, Nickie?” the woman had a wicked grin as she said this. The girl extended her bent leg quickly hitting Natasha hard on the hip making her lose balance and fall to the ground, on the forest side. The woman fell on her feet, her legs bent to absorb the impact, her hands touched the ground, she looked up at Nichole glaring “What´s wrong with you?” she hissed “Are you really the monster we send every night to get people´s lives?!”

“You said so yourself, I´m a monster. I care for nothing…”

“But you´ve never been like this with me, lately, you´ve gone … -the woman sighed- you could’ve hurt me”

“What do you think was the idea?”

“Why would you want to hurt me?”

“Why would you bring a gun with you to come see me? –the girl nodded to the silver gun shining on the ground- how would you explain to Karl that you´ve destroyed his money-making monster, slash, daughter?”

“It´s for protection”

“From?”

“You´ve gotten strange lately”

“So you would use it to hurt me… I wonder what Karl would say or do?” the girl smirked

“I´m a doctor, I´d hit you where it wouldn´t kill you. I might even give you a lovely scar” the woman bent quickly to take the gun.

“It´s nice to meet you, Natasha” the girl was fast and had pulled the woman´s hair back causing her to expose her neck, a knife was less than a centimeter close to her exposed skin “I had good trainers, you know –the monster had taken over, it was whispering into Natasha´s ear, the woman tried to move her head away- and Tilly made a fine monster –there was a smile on the girls voice- but even her was gone by my hands…”

“Let me go, Nichole!” the woman said firmly but nervousness was licking through her tone

“You helped me feel no remorse… I wouldn´t feel a thing by making you go…”

“Don´t blame me! I didn´t make you this way. It´s not me you should blame. I just was there”

“Then who I blame? Eh? You seem pretty guilty to me”

“Blame Karl! Blame Miriam!”

“My mother had nothing to do with this” the girl hissed and pushed the woman away from her making her stumble

“She´s not guilty and I am?”

“I never saw you do a thing when you were stitching me up and bandaging me after getting beaten up…”

“It was my job” the woman said with short breath slightly looking to a side

“It was your job to make me better so that I could go and get beaten again? You’re a worse monster than me. I was a child, how could you?”

“I had to do it!” tears started to stream down the woman´s eyes

“You had to let a child be abused like that… Don´t you have a soul?”

“I was first on your father´s list!” the woman said sobbing

“What list?”

“I told you last time I was just an assistant at the place your parents went to help your mother get pregnant… in your father´s eyes everyone involved was guilty. I had to help him take care of you or he was going to make you… touch me” the woman fell to her knees and then sat on her side. The girl walked closer to her

“And what´s going to stop me now?” the girl said with a smirk. The woman reached for her gun, still on the ground, the girl laughed.

“Are you really going to shoot me? I doubt you have Tilly´s ability –the girl tilted her head- or who knows… maybe she went to you to know which place to put the bullet for me not to die… only to leave me with… what was it? –she pretended to have forgotten- ah, yeah, a lovely scar. Did you tell her where to aim so that she didn´t kill me? Awww stop crying –the girl cooed- you can shoot me, go on, I can take it after all I had to learn to stand the pain but …you, on the other hand, have no idea how it feels to be shot” she grinned as if what she had just said was pleasant

“I never meant to hurt you”

“But you enable others to hurt me…”

“If I didn´t I was going to be killed…”

“What makes you now? You’re not only the nurse that welcomes my parents anymore. You don´t have to stitch me up after one of Tilly´s new ideas of training…”

“Your father knows bad people” the woman´s voice seemed to falter

“But I´m the epitome of any of his monsters”

“I can´t leave you” the words were barely audible

“And why is that?”

“I know that you don´t believe me but I do care about you. I was there when you were born; I was there even before that. I held you close to me when you cried, I cried when… when you lost your mom…”

“So you know me well?”

“Yeah… and this is not like you”

“You’ve been there for me?”

“I have”

“Who was on the list?”

“Nichole…”

“You´ve tangled yourself in your lies, now talk”

Double Life: Drawing Shades and Smiles

A/N: Thank you for this pix Saku! 

This is quite short but I think I like it this way

***

“What made me like rainy nights was that I was free of the nightmare on those nights” she didn´t answer his question but offered some inside to her mind, he never rejected those. Her eyes seemed to be looking at some distant memory, and she was, she was seeing a younger version of herself not having to be the monster on rainy nights, she´d made herself believe that her father did that to protect her, for her safety, she huffed.

“It´s the opposite for me” the boy said letting her know it was ok to talk, it was his way to tell her she could trust him as he had done, this wasn´t lost on her.

“That was before… but it was how I came to like it, besides… water, and water from heaven seems to be cleansing..”

“I see…” he said but he didn´t, he just wanted to let her know he was listening

“Maybe… if good memories get done during your rainy nights, it will be easier for you?” she said in a soft voice and with warm eyes that made her look innocent and child-like, he half-smiled at her effort.

“Maybe” he said and saw her genuine smile, followed by her head lightly shaking from side to side

“Josh?” it had been a while since she´d gone back to drawing and he´d been lying on the grass again with eyes closed

“Mmmh?” he mumbled

“Do you think if you knew what happened back then… you might feel better?”

“Yeah, she´s always in my nightmares… I think it might help”

“Would you mind me looking for her?” she asked quietly, he opened his eyes again and found Nic´s eyes on her drawing pad. She didn’t look at him

“How would you do that?”

“I don´t know… I´d have to know more of your time at the hospital, though” she was still focused on the drawings; he didn´t answer so she looked up at him, his eyes seemed deeper, more like the forest.

“I´d like to find a way to make you feel better too” he said above a whisper. She closed her eyes as a smile found its way on her lips.

Josh sat up and reached up to her hair. Very lightly he put a strand of her dark hair behind her ear. He felt her tense, she opened her eyes and all trace of warmth there had been consumed by a cold stare.

“I´m sorry… I didn´t mean to…” his hand fell limp on his lap

“You didn´t..?” he thought to see a small flicker of disappointment in her eyes but it had been quickly burned by the ice-like gaze her eyes had “You need to leave now” She stood up with graceful calculated moves

“I’m sorry. I didn´t mean to upset you” he stood up as well, concern thick in his voice. She exhaled a tiny sigh

“It’s not that. Please, just go”

“Don´t be mad at me” the boy was about to take a step forward but stopped himself

“You need to go now –she took a step closer to him as he had attempted to do. He watched him close her eyes and heard her take a deep breath- I´m not mad at you, I promise” she opened her eyes and they had managed to show part of the warmth they had shown before

“Why…?” he started to ask wondering if her eyes were like her bright, beautiful yet fake smile. His thoughts stopped when her hand was lifted and it seemed like she was going to touch his cheek but instead it landed on his shoulder

“I… I´m not the only one who sneaks in and out of this school, but this is a safe place, don´t worry” she added when his eyes grew wide “but I need you to go”

“Is this place safe for you?”

“It´s just Nat and if it is I can take care of myself –she flashed him a genuine smile- but I don’t want her to think much of you… I don´t want you to stand out to her” she explained but he didn´t attempt to move “please, Josh, you need to go”

“Alright” he said with a sigh

“Thank you” her hand fell from his shoulder touching it´s way to his hand where she quickly squeezed once, he smiled and then he bent to pick up his things as she hopped in the thick stone wall, one of her legs dangling on a side

“It´s rude to stare at my legs like that” she quietly sing-sung with a smirk, he only shook his head.

“Dinner?” he said as he was leaving

“Go, Josh” she smiled a little as she closed her eyes again. This time when she opened them again, they were back to being ice. He waved once and swiftly walked away.

DL´s stuff

As I was typing Taking a Peek the song Common Reaction by Uh Huh Her was playing on my playlist. I´ve liked that song for a while but as I stopped to listen to it I realized it kinda fits Nichole or maybe even DL and this last post made me see it.

This is not the original version, it´s like an acoustic version or something but this is the version that fits DL.

Then, when I was looking for pix for this last post, I found one that reminded me of Nic, I think it´s like a cover of a book or something. I think this girl is a lot like Nic, the way her hair looks -except the color- the woods as background... yeah, this is the closest of how Nic looks in my head, a bit younger maybe... but pretty close

ofc this is not mine, I just stumbled w/it on google

this is the type of green that I image Josh´s eyes to have 

Double Life: Taking a Peek

A/N: I think I like this one. I also think it´s longer that the others. And as almost always, if not always, I haven´t proofread and I probably won´t ...

***

“I´m not going to go to the Art Club today” she said when he got to the wall, she´d agreed to eat together. Joshua had gotten both their lunches; she was with her back against the wall. She was drawing some sketches when he arrived.

“You said that already” he hander her both food containers and then he dropped his backpack and sat in front of her Indian style

“I wanted to remind it to you” she grabbed the tea bottle he had taken out of his backpack

“Ok” he grinned. They started eating.

“I have already started my project too” he commented breaking the comfortable silence they had been eating in. Nichole raised both her eyebrows as a way of acknowledgement “this –he grinned as he motioned his fork between both of them- is research” he chuckled a little in the end, she stared at him for a second and then laughed quietly.

“That´s a good one” she nodded

“I´ve known Maya and Jonah are getting together to work on their project”

“She´s making him get together with her, I bet”

“You don´t talk but you know her well”

“I´ve been classmates with her for a while”

“The others are sort of doing the same, just like them”

“I see” one of the corners of her mouth twitched up

“Yeah… we could do it too”

“I don´t want to. The final project is the one that I want to see, with no influence from my part, only what you see”

“I wouldn´t be influenced by you”

“Right…” she smirked

“But it seems that you think that I´d influence you” he said playfully, her face was back to be pretty much expressionless but her eyes were warm.

“No matter what you say, you´re not getting a peek of what I´m doing… You´ll just have to be patient… but –she put her food container on a side and took her drawing pad and pencils- I can do a portrait of you now”

“Really?” his eyes were slightly wider, he seemed to do that when he got excited about something.

“Yeah, just act normal and look at me” she draw one her legs closer to her chest to support the drawing pad, her hand went under to steady it as her right hand started to scratch the paper with the pencil. She occasionally glanced up at him and quickly went back to the paper, at other times she´d stared at him with no expression besides her slightly pursed lips. He smiled at those moments and she for the most part remained the same except that her lips stopped being pursed. She only took her eyes from the paper or him when she took a different pencil.

“Do I look ok?” the boy asked founding increasingly difficult to remain silent as her eyes bored in his, she tilted her head slightly.

“What do you think?”

“I don´t know if you´re doing a cartoon…” a light shade of pink had colored his cheeks, she stared at him with a tiny smile

“I´m not doing a cartoon”

“Ok, good to know –he looked down- Can I take a peek at it?” he looked up as she rolled her eyes

“This is exactly why I don´t want to give you any peek” she shook her head a bit

“Oh, come on! I´ll be good” he smiled and she chuckled

“You are” she winked and then she turned her drawing pad for him to see

“Wow! You´re good” he was about to take the drawing pad

“No touching!” she moved it away

“Why? Oh –he interrupted himself- you have your project in there, don´t you?” he seemed amused

“Ideas”

“Ideas?”

“That´s what I have there”

“So, you do have your project there”

“If that´s what you want to believe”

“Do you think it´ll rain tonight?” he asked looking at the cloudy sky. They had been silent for a while. He had laid down on the grass and she´d continued to draw.

“It´s pretty cloudy but so far I don´t think so” she said looking up

“The sky is really gray” he turned his face to look at her

“At least in the next couple of hours it won´t rain, maybe more” she said absentmindedly going back to her drawing

“How would you know that?” he asked, she briefly took her eyes from her drawings to look at him and shrugged.

“I think we should go, it´ll rain”

“We can go, if you want, but it won´t rain”

“You don´t know that, the sky is gray”

“I know it won´t”

“How?” he inquired, she looked at him and seemed to be debating something within herself but then she closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

“I can feel it”

“Well, of course the wind…”

“No, it´s not just that, everything changes, the sounds vary, the changes in the air are subtle but it´s there… when you feel the wind that´s an imminent rain” she explained, he blinked a few times

“Are you telling me that you can predict rain?”

“No, just that I notice the subtle changes sooner”

“That sounds like the same to me” he rolled to a side and held his head above the ground with his bent arm “How do you do that?”

“I don´t know…” she kept drawing

“How do you know you could do it?”

“I hadn´t really noticed, it was just something that was normal to me but that later I learned that it was one more of the things that make me be further of that mark…” her mouth seemed to go downwards a little

“I think it´s amazing!” there was a smile in his tone and in his eyes, she paused her drawing and stared at him; after a minute a grin appeared on her lips, a slight white color showing itself between her lips

“Does Camille do that too?” he asked when she went back to drawing

“What?”

“Predict the weather?” he explained, her eyes quickly moved to him with a frown, he was about to apologize

“I… I don´t know” her eyes became deep like when she was with her little sister but Josh also noticed the same look she´d given him when he got shot. She was concerned.

“It´s a cool thing if she did” he tried to comfort her, she half-smiled only to show him she appreciated his effort.

“Nic?”

“Mmmh?” she had kept drawing, the concern still somehow visible in her eyes

“Maybe you should rest” he had gone back to look up the sky, only stealing glances at her

“I´m resting” she mumbled

“No, I mean it”

“I mean it, as well”

“You seem like you haven´t slept well…” he spoke quietly

“I can see the dark rings under your eyes too” she said startling him, she was kneeling right next to him, one of her fingers tracing the marks of his lack of sleep. He looked up at her.

“I´ve had troubles sleeping” he said to her who was still following the patterns under his eyes with a finger, it was like being touched by a feather.

“Why?”

“Err.. I don´t know If I´m comfortable talking about it”

“Why?” she showed him a crooked smile

“It´s silly”

“It´s not if it keeps you awake” she lightly tapped the tip of his nose

“I… I think the sound of the rain makes me remember… my accident… it gives me nightmares” he sighed

“It does sound like being surrounded by water… What about sleeping pills?”

“I still get the nightmares with the difference that I can´t wake up”

“Oh” she was tracing his eyebrows very slowly; she stopped when her finger touched the small, almost invisible mole at the end of his eyebrow. He closed his eyes slowly. Her fingers went back to touch under his closed eyes and then off his skin. He opened his eyes.

“You can go to sleep now… I´ll wake you up later” she offered

“That´s not a good way to keep you company”

“You´re not even supposed to be here” she smirked

“But since I am, I´m doing it properly”

“It might benefit me, project wise, to have you asleep” she lightly passed her hand over his face making him close his eyes, he grinned.

“You don´t want me to see you?” he kept his eyes closed, the grin was evident in his voice

“On the contrary, those green eyes are pretty easy on the eye” she spoke honestly making his eyes snap open “it´s a nice shade of green” she said making him close his eyes again

“You should rest too” this time he kept his eyes closed

“I told you, I´m resting” she spoke quietly, he sighed

“I mean that you should sleep too”

“I plan to do that tonight”

“Why haven´t you been sleeping? I hope it´s not because of the project”

“It´s not”

“Then?”

“My nights are nightmares sometimes too”

“What are they about?”

“Death” she said softly, he opened his eyes again and reached for her hand

“I’m sorry”

“It´s not your fault”

“Still… What triggers them?” he asked, she didn´t answer but stared at the trees for a long while.

Double Life: Meals

“You didn´t swim last night” a voice said behind her in the cafeteria line

“I didn´t” she responded slightly turning her head as she was paying for her food with her ID, were they had the registered the amount of money given to them. She felt someone behind her as she walked over an empty table. It was early so the cafeteria was pretty deserted. Nichole chose a table near the wall, close to a window.

“Can I sit here?” a green eyed boy asked flashing a smile.

“No” she said and the boy anyways, he took the booth across from hers. Nichole poured her maple syrup on a side of her plate and then she separated the two pancakes, one in the center of the plate and the other one close to the edge, half on top of the one in the middle.

“Isn´t the syrup supposed to be poured on the pancakes?” the boy said taking a bite of his food. The girl said nothing and continued eating, cutting a piece of the pancake with the fork and dipping a side of it in the syrup.

“You have dark rings under your eyes like you haven´t slept for a few days…” the boy commented observing her face

“Why are here this early?” her tone was a combination of annoyance and curiosity

“I always get up early” the boy answered, she pursed her lips a little in a pensive manner.

“I had never seen you here in the mornings”

“I hardly ever eat here” he said, Nic only glanced his way.

“You´re supposed to ask why” Aaron broke the silence, she raised an eyebrow.

“Is that so?”

“Yes, that´s how you make conversation flow”

“If you want to tell me why you don´t eat here in the mornings, go on…”

“Why are you like that? That much you dislike me?”

“It was you the one who said that didn´t like me” she motioned her fork between them, a light blush crept up his cheeks

“You had broken my nose”

“No, you were running in the library and tripped against my leg –he opened his mouth- don´t you think that hurt me too?”

“I…”

“And then, I had to apologize twice and lead you and Josh to the cafeteria, return and take both your things to your respective and in different buildings rooms… all this –she stared straight to his eyes- when I hadn´t even done a thing…” her gaze was piercing, he hunched a bit and looked down at his food, the tint on his cheeks still visible.

“I’m sorry. I was a jerk to you –he said and she nodded- but you´re so cold”

“You know you don´t have to be here or anywhere near me”

“If Josh was here you wouldn’t be this cold to me” he commented

“I give no special treatment to people” she said remembering the now dead uncle of the twins, she had said to him that they got special treatment.

“Yes, you do. I doubt you take other guys to your room” he said not stopping to look at her, she lifted an eyebrow tilting her head to a side.

“Who says I´ve taken him there? Besides, who I take into my room or whose room I go to is nobody´s business”

“He said he slept there”

“Did he say that?”

“Yes”

“Mmm, I thought he only confirmed having used my shampoo”

“And now you´re saying it too”

“No, I´m not –she opened her schoolbag and took a small bottle- here… Now you can use my shampoo as well” she smirked. The boy narrowed his eyes but took the bottle.

“So, you are saying you gave him a bottle of shampoo?” he said with an incredulous voice. She shrugged.

“You two are hiding something” he said staring at her as she drank her juice. She said nothing.

“Do you have trouble sleeping? –he asked, after another silence, she raised both eyebrows- Josh often had dark rings under his eyes similar to yours when he had trouble sleeping”

“He still has those sometimes” she said.

“Yeah, but he´s been better at sleeping through the night when we were little… he often had much more trouble sleeping during winter. Do you have that?”

“I guess”

The cafeteria had started to fill. Nichole finished her food and took her apple giving it a bite.

“Later” she strolled away from him chewing another bite of her apple.

~~*~~

“I’m hungry!” Josh said as the bell for the class change sounded. It was one more class before lunch. The girl in front of his desk turned back to him and put a mint candy on his desk.

“Thanks” he said as she was turning back to look at the window.

“I´m so hungry!” the boy said again as Nichole was putting her things back in her bag. It was lunch time already.

“Go eat”

“I´m waiting for you”

“You don´t have to”

“That´s not the point” he said, she put the bag strap on her shoulder. His stomach growled. “Hurry, Nic” he prompted as she took a book that she´d let out of her bag.

“Just go ahead, Josh. I´m not even having lunch with you today”

“What? Why? Today´s Art Club day” he said. They had been having lunch together the days when they had to go to the club.

“I feel like having Chinese food and that´s not something you can get at the cafeteria” they started to walk out of the building.

“You won´t be on time for Art Club if you go out of school”

“I´m not going to the club today”

“Why not?”

“Once in a while it´s ok to ditch certain things”

“You sneak in the club room to work more, you never ditch Art Club”

“That you know of –she smirked- besides, I don´t feel like going today”

“Why not?”

“You ask too many questions, that´s not healthy”

“Asking is always ok. Why wouldn’t it be?”

“You might find out something you´re better not knowing”

“I still want to know. You love Art Club” he had his brow furrowed. She looked at him with a small smile, he smiled back. His eyes seemed to smile as well.

“I´m working on my project” she said after a while. His smile grew.

“Can I see?”

“I told you that you were not looking at it before the due date” They got to the cafeteria doors.

“See you” she gave him her half smile and then turned to leave.

“Hey, hey, wait” he caught her hand. The girl turned around with a raised eyebrow “don´t go away… it´s only a week to end this school year and I don´t know if…” he trailed off, his voice less audible. She took a couple of steps closer

“I´m not going away today” she said above a whisper and then smiled looking at the other students passing by that turned their heads to see them.

“But you will next week, aren’t you? And you know it, that´s why you´re giving me that smile you have when you are not happy but feel like you should smile”

“I don´t know, Josh” she pulled him away of the center of the hall.

“Don´t leave…”

Until Tomorrow

A/N: I just had to write this. Saku, if you´re watching this, don´t read it, I think you won´t like it. -ofc you can read it but you´ve been warned.

****

“I want to ask you something” he said with a glint in his eyes and a light shade of pink coloring his cheeks.

“Alright, what is it?” she looked up from her computer, stopping what she was doing to listen to him. There was a brief silence.

“No… you´re too busy now, I´ll tell you tomorrow when you´re free” he said with a pleasant smile that reached up to his caramel-colored eyes.

“Until tomorrow, then” she returned the smile and continued sketching what would be another house or luckily a home for somebody.

*

It was past midnight when she finally finished her design, she´d been especially thorough in this one, not that she didn´t put her all in all her designs but this was an important one for her.

She was alone in the fifth floor of the building; her light was the only one on. She hit the print button on the computer and rubbed her eyes with her thumb and index finger yawning as she arched her back against the gray chair.

Bare foot she walked towards the plotter and took a second to see her creation, she smiled to herself pleased with it. And then she went back to her work space, there, she rolled it and put it in a container, it was a long red cylinder.

She wrote a “Hope you like it” on a slip of paper and tucked it in with the blue print then she closed the cylindrical container and took it to another work place. The door or the room was closed. She hung the container that looked like a red quiver on the door knob. A small smile crossed her features.

She put her desk and workspace in order, and then removed her things, the ones that she thought were of no use to anybody, putting them on a big white plastic bag and then stood in the middle of it observing the place for a moment. Quickly she put on her boots, grabbed her bags and coat and headed to the elevator, there she pushed the button to the parking lot under the ground.

“See you” she greeted the security guard once she exited the place on her car.

“Until later” the man waved a hand. She drove away. Once in her apartment she made some hot chocolate and poured some cold milk into it, she sat in her kitchen, a piece of paper in front of her and a pen on her hand, she took a sip of her milk chocolate and then pursed her lips realizing she had nothing to say nor no one to say it to, so, instead of writing a note, she started to draw a cottage and a small garden with many flowers. She finished her chocolate when the clock struck three in the morning. She got up and washed the cup and placed it on the dish rack then walked to her bedroom and turned the lights off

*

The next morning a note on a small envelope was placed on her desk. He noticed as he placed it that her things were not there, her pictures of sunrises and her sketches of flowers and birds were no longer attached to her walls, he looked in her small bookshelf and noticed her books were still there but her drawing pad that she kept on top of it was gone. He found it odd. He left the note there and went to his office. When he got there he found the red blueprint container hanging from his door knob, he immediately opened it. It was an amazing design. He kept the little slip of paper and pinned it to the cork board he had, he smiled to the handwriting.

A few hours later he called her. She never came late even when she´d spent the night working and she hardly ever called in sick. He called her more times than the necessary. He felt his heart to start beating harder.

*

The note remained on her desk as he and a couple of her co-workers marched behind the coffin that carried her body, the people there could be count with the fingers of a person hands. She’d been dressed in white. As she was about to be buried, he went to the coffin.

“I really like you –he whispered in a broken voice- I wanted to know if you´d like to go out with me sometime” his eyes were drowned in tears as he place a thin silver chain with a flower pendant on her hands. He felt the air wasn´t enough.

“Your design was amazing, I really liked it” he bent over and placed a peck on her cold lips and then walked away regretting not telling her what he had wanted to say that other day because for her tomorrow never came.

Sex and Love

It´s been a while since I didn´t post anything music-related, mostly b/c the songs I like go to FB but these two, the ones I will post are idk too much to b on FB -not b/c they´re weird but because for some reason they are different.

The first on is Sex on Fire by Kings of Leon. I don´t understand it well, specially the video but I like it a lot for some reason, even the singer voice when it gets like some kind of scream. I guess the vid w/the man on that sort of bed is like the tittle, idk the images, the close-up of the eye of the singer is a powerful image. Oh and the man on 1:18 minute of the song reminds me of Dominic Page hehe

now, the other song is Give me Love by Ed Sheran. I heard one of this singer´s songs on the radio and then as an accident I heard another one that reminded me of one of my favorite story and then by another accident I clicke on this song but I didn´t listen to it, I changed it to Kiss Me -other of his songs- but Give Me Love kept appearing so I gave it a chance and wow! I liked it inmediately, it´s so sad but it´s a good song. I like most of this guy´s songs, they´re pretty cool.

Don´t you think that the still images that appear before pushing the play button on this videos are great?  those expressions say so much -or so I think

Double Life: On the wall

This pix is amazing, it´s not mine, I couldn´t find the author but wow!

A/N: This is kinda short but I like it

**

Nichole stood in front of her opened window feeling the cold wind and listening to the distant rain that was showering the woods. It advanced in seconds towards Burgeoys. A tiny smile touched her lips. She moved to her desk and sat taking her drawing pad and pencils.

She looked at her window for a moment breathing the cold, moist air and closing her eyes for a second, the tiny smile went back to her lips and she started to make thin pale lines that quickly became a pair of eyes, eyes that her mind knew were going to be painted green, as green as the forest that now was being watered by the dark sky.

Unfinished that first draft was put away and the pencils directed by Nichole´s hand started a new one. As the lines were done making the body of a boy looking up the sky with his hands on the fence of a building she decided that this one was going to be stripped of color but the theme was not dark and by no means it meant it was a sad one, melancholic maybe, but not sad, she smiled to herself and continued drafting.

Twigs and the moist ground covered with leaves made a squish noise under the pressure of a light weight. The rain had ceased a few hours ago but the soil hadn´t had time to drink it all. It was dark. Nichole walked between the thin white fogg that hugged the forest, she´d just came back from one of her missions, she hated being the monster but being hugged by the forest was cleansing for her. The girl sat on the humid stone wall that limited the school grounds from the woods. Her raincoat avoiding that her pants got wet.

Nichole saw the sky turn from black to dark blue and then to gray, she closed her eyes and breathed slowly, inhaling the cold air. As the sun started to tint orange the sky, the birds started their song, quietly first, only the early risers sang but when the orange covered the sky like a sloppy painting of a brush, more and more birds welcomed the day, thanking heavens for the sun. The girl sighed as she pondered. Just think about it were the words that kept sounding inside her head. She was thinking about it and wavering, she´d never taken back a decision. Hesitating could mean dying or being discovered. That was something that she couldn´t allow to happen but she was on the fence in this one. The girl chuckled humorlessly. “I’m on the wall” she mumbled to herself jumping off of the wall and slowly walking back to her room, purposely taking the longest way.

Double Life: Hanging

A/N: ok, I decided to post it even if this one´s so far from being a decent chapter -w/e. I´ve been wanting the twins together w/Nic for a while, she´s finally  granted my wish. 

Oh, the tittle of this one makes me laugh, I hope you get it -if not... oh, well

This is in need for a lot, starting for proofread but also it needs a pix, I might look for one or maybe not -nowing my lazy disposition when it comes to editing this poor post will forever stay at the lowest of my already low standards in writing (not to mention the annoying author´s notes hahaha)

***

Joshua looked at a shadow passing in front of the high windows of the room. He quickly got out and ran upstairs to the roof two floors above. He opened the door of the roof but there was nothing there, he walked towards the fence and sighed looking up to the sky with his hands on the metal fence. He turned around and saw a girl observing him from the roof of the small cabin that covered the stairs.

“Nichole! I thought I saw you”

“You did?” she raised both her eyebrows

“Yeah… What are you doing here?”

“Sitting” her face was pretty much expressionless except for the amusement he saw in her eyes. He rolled her eyes

“I´ve never seen you around on the days we don´t have art club in the afternoons”

“And you notice that now?” she smirked

“No –he huffed- but there has never been the chance to bring it out” he confessed

“I go out” she winked

“How come no one notice you are so much outside school?”  he asked in a tone between surprised and annoyed. She chuckled.

“They don´t care about a cat but said cat is great at sneaking out”

“Are you not worried of getting caught?” he said and she smile softly, it has been a while since he had objected to not going by the rules when it came to her.

“No –she grinned- but, I leave with permission”

“You do?” he blinked

“Don´t look so surprised”

“I… I…”

“I go out to do something like what you do in here” she pointed to his karate uniform. Josh and his twin had always practiced it.

“You do karate? Why not join the club?”

“MMA –she said- and I couldn´t. I´m bad at sports” she quietly laughed. That was what everybody thought, she´d never participated and she was purposely slow in P.E.

“I noticed you don´t show your skills in P.E.”

“mmmh” she hummed

“Josh, what the heck? Why would you leave like that?” Aaron asked his twin who was looking ahead. Aaron furrowed his eyebrows and followed Josh´s line of vision “Oh… I see what happened…” he said raising one eyebrow.

“You guys shouldn´t have left your class” Nichole commented

“It was just a few minutes” Josh started, his twin huffed

“We were on free time to fight someone else” Aaron finished

“Oh. You lost your match then” she said walking closer to the edge of the cabin roof and sat there with her legs dangling

“This one lost since he left” Aaron pointed to his twin who had walked to where Nic was

“Coming down?” he asked the girl, she nodded “need help?” Josh offered, she looked towards Aaron and nodded once. She needed no help but she didn´t want Aaron to know that.

“How did you get there in the first place?” Aaron asked going to where she was as well.

“Easier to climb” she said

“Jump and I´ll catch you” Aaron said grinning

“Right… that´s not happening”

“Ok, ok… what about a rope? Could you climb down though it?”

“I guess…” she said unsure, Josh hid a smile, he knew just like her that she could

“Give me your belt, Josh” he said and tied both their belts then threw it to Nichole.

“Thank you, Josh and Aaron” she said once she was on the floor “though now… how will you get your belts back?” she´d tied it on the roof of the cabin

“I don´t mind my robe being open” Aaron grinned

“I don´t mind it either” she looked from his face to his chest and back to his face with a smirk which caused the boy to blink at her bluntness. His twin laughed.

“Wanna touch” Aaron regained his stance

“You´d die if I did that” she tilted her head and now he laughed “Besides, you´re sweat” she wrinkled her nose

“Josh, we need to finish that match” her words seemed to remind Aaron of that  “Nichole you´ll be the judge” he grinned at her

“Aaron, don´t make her do things…”

“It´s ok, I wouldn´t mind” she said surprising the twins who looked at her with equally big eyes, she shook her head and headed to the stairs with the boys behind.

Once they got to the karate room, the students were gone but the instructor allowed them to use the place. She watched them fight a couple of times, they were pretty even. They also seemed to enjoy what they were doing.

“Are you swimming tonight?” Aaron asked as he and Nichole were waiting for Josh, he´d been called by the instructor, they all guessed it was about him leaving earlier.

“What makes you think I´d tell you that?”

“I know you wouldn´t but based on your answer I can tell if you might or not”

“That eager you are of spending time with me?” Nichole raised both her eyebrows

“mmm –Aaron touched his chin with two of his fingers pretending to ponder about it –maybe” he end up saying. Nichole laughed quietly. He seemed to be taken aback

“What is it?” she inquired

“You´re laughing”

“People laugh”

“I had never seen you do it”

“You look too much like your brother today …but you´re identical twins after all” she rolled her eyes

“Does Josh make you laugh?”

“He´s funny”

“I thought you could tell us apart” Aaron said more to himself than to her

“I can. But I´ve lately seen his side that´s like you” she winked to a wide-eyed Aaron

“Did you get in trouble?” Nichole asked when Joshua joined them

“No, he just wanted to know what had happened and to make sure it didn´t happen again” his tone was annoyed

“Sorry” she offered brushing his hand

“Dinner?” Aaron asked not noticing the hands of the other two

“It´s still early” Josh said

“It will rain soon” Nichole commented as they got out of the building, it was foggy and windy outside.

“Dinner in your room” Aaron said to his twin

“I…” the boy seemed to fidget

“See you later, boys” Nichole started to walk away towards her room. Josh caught her hand, she turned and stared at their hands and then at the boy´s green eyes and a similar pair of eyes fixed on their hands.

“Won´t you have dinner?” the boy asked, now aware of her dislike of the cafeteria

“I will come down later” she responded, he narrowed his eyes a little buy she squeezed his hand once.

“See you tomorrow”

“You can join us” Aaron hurried to say, she rolled her eyes

“I think campus authorities would disagree with that”

“You´ve been in Josh´s room at least twice” Aaron said remembering the time he´d found her there and when they’d seen movies there.

“More reason to not risk it with a third time”

“For what I´ve seen of you, you don´t mind risks”

“Let her be, Aaron –Josh hushed his twin- besides my roommate might be there, we don´t want to cause Nic trouble” he finished; the girl smiled a small smile.

“You better hurry it´ll rain pretty soon” she waved to them and went away.

Any day

***

Not to be liked, really -you´ve been warned, I guess

***

A cheerful good morning

diligent hands

eyes disguised of happiness

vegetables peels

staring too much at the knife

glass-like gaze

the sharp edge seems appealing 

a question in the brain

breath in and breath out

peaceful sleep

drum´s tropical music

the silver knife being the mirror of a sad eye

horror inside the soul

warm summer evening

angels are not enough

colors bluring in an inocuous white

swallowed by a pitch black whole

soft voice with gentle disposition 

punctures to the side, bleeding sides

stripped of energy, of fire to fight

one, two, three

faith, repeat, faith, repeat

it all went black

fantasy is shelter

the wheel spins again

a cheerful good morning

talent to make others see

pain all over

the knife, the cliff, the rope, the pills

any day

strawberry colored life staining the tiles

a nightmare, a dream, so wrong

desired

prays of the gray dust covered saints

stories, tales, suggary promises

shattered glass, broken doll

stainless steel easily going through butter-like surface

thoughts, purposes and confidence

a waste, 500 bits going up and down

never enough

gray matter going red, grey going black

any day...

love spilling

air is not enough