Double Life FF: Lucky

A/N: I found the tittle hilarious hahaha oh, and I finally got to the part where the other FF was supposed to go... It was fun to do this one and that´s the only reason why it got done, just because it was fun to do it. I think that I pushed Josh´s character too far, though, so this might be the first real ff... I just wanted to make him talk and he reluctantly did so and some parts might have not been told by him hahaha -sorry Josh
Also, this one is special... It feels like I haven´t posted in forever >_< inspiration was runing away from me but I hope it comes back and stays forever with me

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I glanced at my watch for the second time and an inadvertent sigh came out of my mouth. I was taking off my coat and wondering if it wouldn´t be too much of an invasion to go to where I wanted to go. It was a little over one in the morning, my shift had just ended. I had spent a little over 48 hours in the hospital which meddled in the amount I had talked to and seen my girlfriend. I hadn´t seen her for a week now. I really wanted to see her but if I went to my apartment I´d probably sleep for most of the day and would end up not seeing her until next week.

Already in my car I wondered if I should call her since I had already convinced myself that going to her apartment was more practical than going to mine, it was closer to the hospital. I didn´t call her. I wondered if she had heard me when I got out of the elevator already in her floor, probably not, she had to be sleeping. I chuckled a little thinking how back when we met it seemed to be me the one who always got sleepy first and I often fell asleep while she was there with me and now I was the one who spent most of the time awoke while she slept.

Right on her door I hesitated and considered turning around and leave but then the nagging in my mind to just be with her made me ignore that thought and I opened the door. Mitch´s eyes greeted me, the cat I had given her was lying on the white couch, it meowed as I closed the door, he came to me and rubbed itself against my leg.

I silently walked to Nichole´s bedroom and felt a little like a creeper, and regretted  not having thinking better this decision...maybe calling would´ve been better. It felt strange to just go to her bed and lay there next to her. We were not even living together. She looked so much in peace, her face relaxed and her breathing even. I adjusted her comforter, which was low on her hips. She sighed and I kissed her temple and decided to leave -which would still made me feel a little like a creeper- I motioned to leave and suddenly felt her nude hand on my wrist, I turned around and saw her hand holding mine, her eyes were closed and if she hadn´t been grabbing my hand I could´ve thought she was still asleep.

"Where are you going?" she asked in a sleepy voice

"Did I wake you up?" I said with some remorse

"I am asleep" she said and I chuckled

"I didn´t mean to wake you up...I just missed you" I said she was still holding me in place

"I heard you since you got out of the elevator"

"Oh...weren’t you asleep?" I furrowed my eyebrows

"I was and suddenly in my dream I heard you..."

"Are my footsteps that loud?" I asked with amusement

"No -she breathed- but I´d recognize them in my sleep or in any crowded loud place" her voice sounded as if she was back to being asleep, her grip on my wrist was softer. I only felt like holding her but instead I kissed her temple again.

"Don´t stay standing there, come to bed already -she startled me by her words and by her slightly irritated tone- I´ve missed you too" she ended up softly letting go of my hand. I moved around the bed to the other side to lay on it. "The bag you left with your clothes is in my closet, go get changed... I don’t like your hospital clothes"

I chuckled, she always said she didn´t like me in my hospital clothes which could be any clothing item that I had used in the hospital. I went to her closet and opened it and as she´d said, there it was. I had forgotten it the last time I had gone out of town and had come here first before going to my apartment; what I have brought for her that time was in that bag, I had left it forgotten when I left and never took it home the other times I came... I think it was a good thing.

"You are quite hot" I heard her voice; I smiled looking back to her. Her eyes were open, watching my back. I had just taken my shirt off. I took my shoes after that as well as my socks "Should I politely look away now?" she said in a teasing tone when I unzipped my pants. I laughed quietly feeling an odd combination of embarrassment and satisfaction. I shrugged and let go of my pants that I replaced with sweat pants all the while feeling her eyes on me. I turned over towards the bed and noticed a smirk on her mouth that matched mine.

"Did you politely look away?" I said getting under the covers

"Shut up" was her quick answer that followed a kiss that started very desperate, her hands on my shoulders and my arms around her, one on her hip and the other caressing the length of her back. She was fierce and I wondered if she was still half asleep, she was without gloves something she never allowed herself to do even if we know she´s not going to hurt me, she says she doesn´t want to take any chance but probably tonight that has gotten forgotten ´cause she was very into the kiss. She broke it after biting my lip a little. We were staring into the other´s eyes after that. I know she saw much more than me, it was mostly dark with just a faint glow of the other buildings lights coming in through the window and the curtains.

"I think I will change in here a little more often" I joked earning a playful smack on my shoulder and I bet a glare as well. "I´ve missed you so much" I whispered and caught her lips, she smiled into the kiss, that smile of hers which is more of a half-smile because only the side of her mouth curls up, this one too, got frenzy after a moment, with her venturing for more exploration on my chest and shoulders. I couldn´t have enjoyed that more. She was already half on top of me. My hands had gone down her top feeling the smooth skin on her back. Our kiss got slower but much more passionate.

She suddenly stopped altogether the kiss as she heard a sound coming from me when she ran a hand on my chest under my t-shirt. I guess she just fully woke up. She started to retreat herself off of me and I tighten my grip on her

"No, no, no don´t go" I realized I was a little short of breath

"I..." she had shied away

"No, please, angel, we´ve gone over this..." I had to stop myself from giving such a forceful voice despite my mild disappointment and frustration

"Love, you know I don’t know what will happen if..." she trailed off. I noticed the endearment she´d used, only in very rare occasion she did that, it could be either very, very good or very bad. She´d used that for the first time when she accepted to go out with me, that had been a very good one and then she used it when she refused to let me kiss her more than just a peck that had been a bad one.

"Nothing bad will happen. I am sure of that" I took her right hand and kissed it, she flinched a little but I lingered there "You see... I am fireproof" I joked. She sighed in what sounded like a combination of a huff and a laugh

"I am sorry" she buried her face between my shoulder and neck. It was all tension between us. I hated that she felt like she had to apologize, she didn´t need to, I was happy with what she gave me, I was happy that she´d let me stay instead of sending me to the couch or back home.

"I love you" I said and felt her smile against my skin

"Why?" she lifted her face to see me as if she didn´t think it was a good time for me to say that.

"For that gracious way of walking that you have" I said with a smirk knowing she´d appreciate what that would do to the tension between us

"So shallow -she fought a grin- I’ll dump you if you keep on like that" she raised an eyebrow

"And I´ll chase you ´till the end of the world" she stared at my eyes and gave me a short but soft kiss

"Because of those warm chocolate eyes that tell me you love me" I caressed her back. She closed her eyes for a second and opened them to show me she´d hid some of her feelings. I continued giving reasons. "Because you let me see what they say" the warmth came back doubled along with her smile "Because that small smile of yours so real and just mine" I pulled her down for a peck on her lips, she needed her time, she needed space and I was no fool to deny her that.

"Because you are always taking care of me despite yourself" I said reminding her how she kept pulling away from me to avoid hurting me "Because you memorized my steps and my heartbeat"

"They're music" she whispered still looking into my eyes

"Because despite of everything you´ve gone through you´ve kept your heart pure..."

"I don't know about that..." sadness tainting her voice

"I do ´cause I am in that heart" I gave her a loving smile, I only barely saw her expression and the subtle changes in her face but I was well aware that she didn´t need light to see me

"You are" she kissed me this time

"I love you for all you are and for all that you´re not and for all that you give me and for all the things we´ve yet to share and because you´ve let me in your heart and soul"

"You´ve gotten pretty good at sweet talking" she teased. I chuckled. It used to throw me in a loop when she did that but now I know that is her way of gaining some control over things. My love is scared when she does not know what to do.

"I've got an eye candy right in front of me" I teased back, she laughed quietly

"…So shallow" she shook her head. She had attempted to make a disappointed tone that did little to cover her amusement. "Too bad you can´t see it properly –she started –whereas I have an amazing view of mine" my shirt left my body and right after I felt her lips on my neck, it drove me crazy.

"The eyes of my heart don´t need lights to see your beautiful soul" I kissed her cheek, she laughed with delight

"You just said that ´cause you´re about to get lucky" she whispered softly in my ear, her breath tickled me and I realized her voice and skin were much more effective than any coffee to keep me awake and any pill to keep me  interested

"I am already lucky"

"Maybe..." she trailed off and managed to roll us so that she was on her back looking up at me. She reached to one of her bedside lamps and touched it making a soft glow come out of it, I saw her better, her eyes were intense and I knew mine were.

"Your eyes are huge –she giggled and I realized this was the first time I’ve heard her do that- you’re body´s changing" she said going back to her usual tone, the intensity was not lost "you’re making mine change" she breathed and guided my hand carefully under her top. I watched dazzled and my fingers feel a line of rougher skin where I know I made a few stitches a long time ago. I made my hand move away the thin fabric of her shirt and with closed eyes I kiss that scar, she breathes in sharply and I look up, she moves my hand closer to her side and I was forced to look down, there was another scar, I looked at her with questioning eyes, hers seemed a little sad and shy.

"That got done the same way you got this one" she touched my arm where a bullet grazed me the first time I went out of Burgeoys with her, I knew my eyes double their size

"When..?" I asked and all she did was show me another scar that seems similar to the one I stitched except it was on the other side, that one looked smaller but deeper, it was a little darker than her fair skin.

"I could have more but they were careful of not marking my body too much" she explained and made me touch over her ribs, small bumps were felt on some "broken ribs" she said studying my expression "they don't make me such a great eye-candy anymore" she gave an unsure smile. I smiled despite the anger that has risen in me, I knew who ‘they’ were but I know there´s no point in staying angry at things that cannot be undone so I moved down and kissed her scars, my mouth ends right above her navel, she threated her fingers in my hair.

"There´s no woman more beautiful than you" she pulls me up catching my lips, a leg tangling around my waist making us roll again

"…and you´re mine" she gives me a secret smile as she gets rid of her white top. I die a little at the sight of it and she seemed to know, her eyes showed she liked that, she laughed and our lips connected, softly, deeply, exploring… our bodies followed.