wandering 2: Pine tree

Ana was shy and lonely. She often considered her shyness to be a big deffect sometimes, she liked it though, because it was good to have time for herself without the influence of others but in her alone time, there were times that she felt like falling off a cliff "there´s always a need of another sould to keep us company" she thought at those moments... "nothing I can do about it" she told her other half while trying to shake off the feeling of emptyness.

She spend pretty much all her time at school. It was so tiresome. One of many times while she was in the line to buy her lunch she heard a voice calling her name, it was a classmate, Mary who waved at her and then asked her to have lunch together, Ana just followed her. It was strange that Mary talked to her, she had never done it, but she noticed this time Mary was not with her usual friends that were like glued to eachother "I wonder where are the other two" Ana thought. Mary walked towards one of the gardens. It was a quiet place, scented with the smell of pine trees; the needles of the pine trees made some kind of carpet over the grass. It was a nice place. They sat.

Ana listened to everything Mary said, she answered all the questions Mary did and as soon as they part she forgot all about the conversation. Since that day every time that she wanted to get away of the noise in the cafeteria or the voices of the students that constantly walked by the halls, she went to the pine tree garden. She liked to sit under the shadow of one of the pine trees. It was a perfect place... most of the times... she was always like that, one moment something could be perfect and the next moment it could be the worst thing ever... the quietness was the best of the place but also the worst. Ana... always on the fence.

It became a habit for Ana to go to that place, so much that sometimes she felt like crying "why? am I sad? why? because I keep coming alone here? why? I dont really have a reason to be sad... that means I should be happy...am I happy? have I ever been happy?" It was like an inner talk, almost a fight...it was like that most of the times. The scene was always the same, Ana sat under the same pine tree, eating her tasteless sandwinch and after eating, she used to laid on the grass to rest, to exist only.

One of so many days, her pine tree was being used by a couple, she was mad, it was her tree "are you crazy? the tree is not ur property! just sit somewhere else!" her inner voice told her. Mad at her inner voice she went to sit somewhere else, it was some kind of a small hill. An inner street of the campus was visible there.
That day before going to the garden she went to the cafeteria but she didnt found anything "eatable" so she just bought a drink and a cookie. Her lunch was almost finished when she heard an ambulance, it was louder and louder. It was comming up from the inner-street of the campus.
Quickly the paramedics ran carrying a stetcher towards the cafeteria after a while they came back with someone in the stretcher, probably someone that had fainted because one of the person`s hand was hanging out, moving at the quick pace of the paramedics.

Ana tried to see who that person was but it was too far, however the hand hanging on a side of the stretcher was too delicate and thin to be a man`s hand so she figured it was a woman. Ana had a tradition whenever she heard an ambulance she would pray a little prayer for whoever was in it. "Lord, please welcome that person in heaven and if they dont know you then give them a chance to know you, Amen" the prayer had changed over the time, she used to pray for the life of the people but since she didnt want to be on earth anymore she thought that maybe there was others with the same wish, but for they`re souls to be saved, that was what mattered after all, she thought.

Ana stared for a while at the place where the ambulance had been and for a second she felt a weird sensation inside her "I hope she didnt left anyone that needed her" she said in a whisper and then she forgot about it while lying on the grass again and staring fixedly at the blue sky.

when the clock turned two she woke up, took her things and walked towards the building of her next class, right when she passed in the place where the ambulance had been she felt the same weird sensation "maybe it was one of the cafeteria ladies, maybe the one I talked to..."  she stopped a little "forget about it Ana!" her inner voice said, she half smiled and kept walking slowly, her eyes looking to the ground.

***
I think this one`s a little weird...