If I had you in front of me I´d embrace you for a long time
but you are not here and I have no news of you since a long, long time
I´ve felt guilty. I never saw you. I barely heard you.
You were there and I never knew, my eyes were set somewhere else
You did everything to make me happy, to see me smile
I was proud for having such effect on you
I never cherished your smile, my eyes went past you.
My lost friend, you gave me things without me asking
your little details came from your heart
they were filled with your love
I was blind to all that
You had to ask for me to pay a little attention to you
I´m sorry I was not a real friend
I left the proves of your love to die
under the cold rain, under the hot sun
I didn´t mind at all
It all froze and burnt. It dissapeared
You begged for me to stay close
All I wanted was to leave, to go away
not from you, but I never saw what you saw
I left you behind
until you gave up
I realized too late you had been there
but you were no longer around
You are now gone
And the most likely, I´m no longer in your mind
or heart.
From time to time, you come to my mind
I realize how little I saw, how little I felt
I feel guilt yet I know you hold no grudge
that´d be so unlike you
Now, this is for you,
the only way I know to say I´m sorry
the way I´m telling you I see now
I feel now, I know now what you knew a long time ago
My lost friend, you marked my life
My lost childhood friend, I hope happiness for you
wherever you are, whoever you are with
I send you my thoughts as you left me your love.
This is sad.
ReplyDeleteMissed opportunities always are. It doesn't seem fair to the other person who was trying to be and do what you needed. Sigh
At the same it's sad, it's also a breath of fresh air. To know that you learned a lesson and became a good enough person to realize how selfish you were in the past, is a sign of growth and maturity.
Although it could also be that you are all alone and are now reflecting on the decisions you've made.
I say "you" but I don't mean YOU. Lol
It isn't fair.
Deleteindeed this was like reflecting but more than being the lost friend or being the one who lost the friend it´s being both.
I know. I do have a lost friend who sort of inspired me but I was too little to see any of these n I was even worse than now in social conventions/socializing so it was not on purpose. hopefully I´ve gotten better ha