Double Life: Like the Forest

“Fries?” Josh asked on the cafeteria line, she nodded “I´ll treat you” he pointed to the food on her tray.

“No, thanks, I´ll pay for mine”

“Nichole…”

“Hurry up, Josh, we have a line behind us” she said grabbing a dessert. He paid for his food and the fries.

When they were about to sit on a table in a more or less quiet space, Josh´s phone rang and he wrinkled his nose when he saw the caller ID.

“Yeah?” he answered “I was busy” he continued sounding annoyed. “What is it, Aaron?” he heard what his twin had to say. “No way! I’m not helping you. I´ll give you my notes but that´s it! I warned you that if you didn´t have your notes complete I wouldn´t help you” he heard some more of his twin’s arguments “I´m eating so leave me alone” he hung up

Joshua told Nichole what the call had been about even if she didn´t ask. She didn´t really commented on it but he didn´t mind her silence, it didn´t mean she didn´t listen just that she didn´t seem to be good with spoken words.

“Hey, the guys of the art club invited us to go with them to town this weekend. Wanna go?” he smiled, she took a fry from the plate they had in the middle of the table, both of them were eating of it.

“Invited us?” she raised an eyebrow

“Yeah” he smiled and shook his head

“What is it?”

“Nothing, it´s just the girls really want you to go” he chuckled

“Then I´m not going”

“You were going to go?”

“I don´t know” she said honestly

“You don’t like the girls?”

“They’re ok, they´re great artists. Maya´s really good in abstract art and Jill´s good at animation”

“Then?”

“If they´re hoping that I go it can only mean they have something in mind that I won´t like –Josh raised his eyebrows questioning, he had never seen Nichole and the girls talking unless it was necessary but Nic seemed to know them well- I´ve been in the art club for a while now and so have they” she explained

“I thought you were either distracted or focused in only one thing but you notice things”

“Wow! What a compliment you´re giving me, I´m either distracted or self-centered” she bowed her head slightly

“No. No, no! –he motioned his hands no- that´s not what I meant…”

“I notice things” she interrupted him and smiled a small smile

“Thank you” he said relieved placing his hand over Nichole´s on top of the table.

“Hey! What are you guys doing?” Nichole heard a voice coming from behind her; she removed her hand from under Josh´s and took some more fries

“We´re eating”

“Here take my notes” Josh pushed his notebook and book to his twin that was sitting next to Nichole, in front of him. She moved away a little.

“Come on, Josh, just give me the summarized version” Aaron asked reaching for the fries in the middle of the table. Nichole moved them away before he could take any

“I thought these were to shared” he pouted

“Not with you” Josh took a few of the fries

“Ah, so it’s a lovey-dovey thing that you do?”

“Are you jealous?” Nichole was immune to his words, Josh chuckled.

“You´re not with this guy” Aaron said with confidence

“Go get yours” his twin said

“Why are you mad?! It´s just fries. I can pay for the plate”

“I´m eating and you come asking me for a summarized version of my notes? Where are yours?”

“Come, it´s not like I´m asking a hard thing to do, besides that way you’ll study double, so it´s a good thing”

“How are your bruises?” Nichole asked Aaron turning to look at him; he just had a light purple color by now

“They´re ok” he said taking the notes from his twin

“In what trouble you got into this time?” Josh said sternly

“No trouble I was just practicing box with the club…” Aaron lied

“You´re lying but I´m not going to ask since we´re not expelled yet”

“I´m not getting you expelled” Aaron hurried to say

“Doesn´t seem like you often remember that” Joshua pointed to his twin´s face

“I´m not getting you expelled” he said almost solemnly

“Ok, you better study then, ´cause I don’t want that people confused me with a flunking guy” he smirked

“I´ve always gotten higher scores than you”

“Only in math-related stuff”

“Still, I don´t copy and do better” Aaron was smug

“Ok, give me back my notes then”

“I´m taking them” he got up before Josh could take them from him

“Do you know what happened to him” Josh asked Nic once his twin was out of sight. She knitted her eyebrows “you knew about his bruises” he said thinking her knitted eyebrows meant she couldn´t have known

“Didn´t you see them?”

“Until I paid closer attention to his face”

“And you call me distracted”

“Ah, so you pay close attention to my twin´s face?”

“He´s easy on the eye” she smirked, his eyes widened a little

“Well, thank you…”

“For?”

“We have the same face”

“Naah, he´s easy on the eyes… a mole make a lot of difference” she was nonchalant, his green eyes had gotten wider and somewhat darker “so, yeah, you´re the less smart, less good looking and less toned” she said passing her middle finger over the palm of his hand “but you´re also less annoying, less idiot and –she paused and he closed his eyes- the green in your eyes is nicer, like the forest…” she half smiled

“Thank you –he opened his eyes, it was a great compliment coming from her, she loved the woods, the girl spent most of her time going there- …so… do you think there´s an ulterior motive for Maya and Jill to want you to go?” he brought back their prior conversation topic

“Your eyes tell me there is” she said with an eyebrow raised. He shook his head as he smiled

“Ok, what do they tell you?” he blinked twice and then looked at her. She stared at him for a moment her gaze was piercing; it was like dark fire that you feel like watching but at the same time just like a bright light that makes you squint your eyes. Her eyes were not empty of emotions as they were when they first met but they had the same intensity that makes people look down.

“They asked you if we were together –she made air quotation marks, still staring at his eyes, he nodded and rolled his eyes- they asked you to invite me”

“That´s easy, I´m doing it”

“They want to know something related to the rumors around me…”

“Rumors? As in many?”

“Yeah –her eyes lost all emotion and light as she uttered that word- the one about my roommate, the one of my rich family giving money so that I can do what I want, the one of me being with you or me with no relationship at all…”

“I´m sorry” once again he placed his hand on top of hers and squeezed it lightly

“For?”

“People gossiping about you without even knowing you”

“It´s ok, they´re boring… so, which one is it?”

“Do you know about the one of you being a model or some model related thing?”

“There’s one about me being a model?! -she huffed and rolled her eyes- they have so little imagination… why would I be a model?!”

“They say that the way you walk make all boys go idiot and that your yearbook pictures are model-like…”

“My walk” she huffed, he eyes became cold and her face expressionless, her breathing controlled and her stance that had been relaxed became tense

“What is it?”

“It´s a stupid rumor” she seemed to mind it a lot

“They want you to teach them or something…”

“I won´t do such a thing” she said and stood up to leave

“Where are you going?” he hurried to her

“To my room”

“Are you mad at me?”

“No”

“Are you mad at them?”

“No”

“Are you mad?” he asked, she stopped turned to him and shook her head no “going to the stone wall?”

“Not exactly”

“Where then?”

“To the other side?”

“But it´s dark”

“I know, I´m not afraid of darkness but you should be” she teased

“I thought you were going to your room”

“I am and then I´m going to the woods” she poked her tongue out to him

“Mind if I join you?”

“It’s dark”

“I still have the flashlight you gave me the other day”

“It might rain”

“You´ll get us an umbrella from your room”

“It´s dangerous for you”

“For you too”

“I take back what I said about you being less annoying” she said humor in her voice. They had gotten to her dorm. She walked up the stairs as he walked to the back of the building where her window was. After a few minutes she came out of it. She landed next to Josh who was standing his back to the building.

“Whoa! –he said surprised- how do you do that?!” he never ceased to be impressed every time she did that kind of things.

“I´m a cat” she handed him a scarf

“I have to give you back the other” he said wrapping the scarf on his neck

“I have plenty, you can keep it. I´m not going to carry this around” she gave him the umbrella she´d taken from her room.

They walked in silence to the wall, it was dark and slightly windy, she walked a few steps ahead Josh who had the flashlight on. When they reached the tall thick stone wall she sat, her back on it, one of her legs drawn to her chest.

“Didn’t you say you were going to the forest?” he stood in front of her

“This is the forest”

“True but just the part that belongs to the school, when you say the forest you mean out of the school”

“Ha! So good boy Josh wants us to break the rules” she said in a teasing manner

“Of course not” he sat next to her and turned off the flashlight

“You can leave that on”

“It´s ok, I don´t want the batteries to run out”

“You should be afraid of darkness that´s where monsters lurk”

“Monsters don´t exist”

“Says you” she poked his side, he flinched and she chuckled

“How did you get there without me noticing?!” he said shocked, she´d been at his left side and when she poked him she was at his right.

“I told you, you should be afraid of darkness”

“It was just you… I´m not afraid of you, how could I be?”

“You should”

“Do you want me to be?”

“I don´t know” she said and he didn´t know what to do or say when she said things like that, so he chose not to say anything, he guessed he didn´t have to understand it all.

“Why do you like it here?” he said after a while in silence

“I believe you´ve asked that before –she said but answered anyways- it´s peaceful… the sounds of the night and of the river ease my mind”

“I don´t like the sound of the river”

“That´s why we´re here where you can´t hear it”

“Can you hear it?” Josh asked, his eyes had slightly adapted to the darkness, he thought she nodded yes “Did someone teach you to walk the way… you walk?”

“Yes” she said after a long time, he had thought she had decided not to answer

“So you did go to modeling classes?” it seemed that conversation got better if he asked

“I had a trainer but this person was the polar opposite of a model” she flinched inwardly, for some reason it was him the first person that got to hear about some reference to Tilly besides Natasha

“Was it hard to learn it?”

“Yeah… you gotta focus on your gravity center and keep your balance and grace”

“Wow, that sounded model-ish”

“Not when your feet are blistered and you have to keep walking for another kilometer”

“You had to walk more than a kilometer?... you don´t have to walk like that anymore if it´s annoying”

“I can´t help it now, it became a habit…”

“I´m sorry”

“You didn´t do it, you don´t have to apologize for that”

“Still”

“It´s ok –she took his hand and squeezed it –girls get jealous of me and guys get stupefied” she said sarcastically

“So, you´re really not going?” their hands were still laced, he shook both their hands lightly

“No, I don´t think so”

“Would you go if they didn´t have the intention to ask you things?”

“Mmmh no, I wouldn´t” she said above a whisper

“I´ll stay with you tomorrow” he said after a while

“You don´t have to do that”

“I don´t mind”

“Go and have some fun”

“You could have some fun too”

“I’m having fun now, you can have fun tomorrow”

“You can have fun tomorrow too”

“Why do you keep insisting in me going?”

“Why not?”

“In the time you´ve known me, there have been more occasions in which you´ve been in danger than all the times you´ve been in danger in your whole life, I bet you´ve broken many more rules since then too”

“I’ve had fun” he admitted and she chuckled

“That´s no reason to keep doing it”

“I don´t mind having some fun”

“You shouldn´t hang out with Nichole Cristales!” she joked “she´s a bad influence on you!”

“Nichole…”

“Mmmh” she hummed knowing some questioning was coming, she didn´t mind it much anymore, in a way it relieved her, just like the woods, it helped her keep her sanity because it made her feel normal, and there was not much risk with Josh because he didn´t insist much if she decided not to ask and he was kind enough to try to find a way to think she was good, in a way it made her sad that she could never be as good as he was.

“Last time we were introduced to your family at your house… your last name is different than theirs”

“Yeah…I used to have the same but not anymore”

She didn´t really want to talk about it, even though it was easier to talk to him, she didn´t want that at some point him knowing things about her might put him in danger.

She didn´t answer but she remembered when she stopped having the same last name as her father. Camille had asked her once why she wasn´t a Duchenne like her and her mom. That´s because I have my mom´s last name, she had explained the little girl and it was true, in a way. It had been Miriam´s maiden name but she was buried as Miriam Duchenne but when his father decided Nichole needed a new last name, for his convenience one of her cousins from her mother´s side had died along with her parents…they were distant, she hadn´t even known them but that little girl, her age had been named Nichole as well and after Miriam’s death Nichole had taken that little girl´s name and her own name had been given to the little girl, for the world, Karl wasn´t even Nichole´s father but his uncle and his daughter had died in that accident. She hadn´t understand it but she was glad to have her mother´s last name with her, especially after he sent her away but now she knew it was a way of protection… she didn´t want to think who he was protecting though… Nichole sighed.

“Yours is interesting, sounds like crystals” he commented, he smiled a little

“That’s why the house is called that way. I like it better too”

They sat there in silence for a long time; the night got darker and colder somewhere away thunders were heard.

“Josh, Josh” she called him, his head was leaned on her shoulder, he´d fallen asleep.

“mmmh?” he opened his eyes to the blackness of the night “uh, oh, I fell asleep” he took his hand to his neck

“I noticed –she said with a smile in her voice- let´s go, it´s about to rain” they got up, he turned on the flashlight but he tripped, the light was not enough and he was sleepy “Come on, Josh! Wake up” she said gently walking back two steps to him where she took his hand and started to walk, the way you´d do if you were guiding a blind person. They walked to his dorm.

“I´m sorry I fell asleep” he said when they got there

“I´m not, you ask too many questions” she teased “Good night, Josh”

“I should´ve been the one walking you to your room”

“I’m not into reinforcing stereotypes –she winked- besides, nothing can happen to me here” she said and he sighed “go sleep”

“ok, ok, good night, Nic”

“Later” she waved and walked away, she too felt like sleeping, despite the memories some of him questions had brought back to her mind, it had been a nice peaceful evening. She smiled as she shook her head, pushing away the voice in the back of her mind that reminded her how she was still the monster and not just Nichole.